To Help

I grew up in a good family - fantastic grandparents, fun cousins, nice sisters and parents I could count on. We sometimes forget that not everyone grows up with a positive influence in their lives; some people never feel loved by their parents, never have close relationships with their family members, and grow up feeling cheated, taken advantage of, and unloved.

Maybe that's why, when I see an opportunity to be a helping hand to a person in need, I jump at it with all of my heart and soul and strength. This week I met a man at The Mustard Seed who was behind 8 years on his taxes and his bank accounts were frozen. No one would hire him because there were garnishee notices for all of his employers, and he came to me, desperate and pleading. Yes, it was his own fault, but I felt he just needed that little bit of help, and then maybe he could straighten his life around. So I contacted his collection agent at CRA, did what needed to be done, and happily told him this morning that he could get back into his bank account.

Now maybe I'm naive - maybe he's going to get back into his bank account and blow whatever is left in there, but I feel like I'm a good judge of character, and I think this guy just needed a break, and I was happy to give it to him.

I'm the first to admit that I get too involved with the downtown crowd, I take them into my heart and overstep the boundaries put in place for our safety, but at some point you also have to listen to the Holy Spirit and go where He guides. If we were all only concerned with our safety, we would have no Missionaries in dangerous countries. They constantly profess that God will protect them for doing His work, and if something tragic happens, it will only further their cause by drawing others closer to Him.

I often feel the same way, with a shadow of protection around me - I have no fear walking around the inner city at night, and no fear of the people I meet every week. I think to do God's work we need to be fearless, not worrying about what others might do or say, but doing what we are called to do, whatever the consequences.

As the weeks and months go on, I feel this Ministry calling me deeper into it, and I wonder how much longer it will be before it envelopes me completely.

All in God's time.

Jupiter and Venus

When I was a young child, I was fascinated with astronomy. At age 8 I could rattle off all of the planets, their distances from the sun, their circumferences, the names of their moons, and their daily average temperature (yes, I was a little nerd). I received a telescope for Christmas and looked at the moon and stars, and wanted to be an astronomer when I grew up.

Practicality took over as a grew older, and astronomy became a fun hobby, but it still holds my interest more than most things. As I drove home from a friend's house last night, the sky was aglow with the almost full moon, and Venus shone bright in the west, unusual since it was not next to the moon. But there beside the bright Venus was a smaller but still bright star - Jupiter! I had read that they were becoming closer in our March night sky, and it's not normally so easy to pick out Jupiter, but there it was.

I was instantly filled with childlike awe, and forgot about petty troubles, taxes, and anything else inconsequential. I just enjoyed looking up at those planets and smiled at the awesomeness of our God's Universe.

It's been a great week - for March, I am oddly at peace and nowhere near as stressed as I usually am. I'm just taking the advice of my buddy Stewart down at the Mustard Seed - he told me he doesn't think about tomorrow or yesterday, but just about today.

Do not worry about tomorrow.....didn't Jesus offer that same advice? I think I'm finally taking it to heart - and it feels great.

Happiness

We had a great sermon at church today, one that has had me pondering all day. Our awesome new Pastor discussed the selfishness of human beings, and had us asking ourselves what would make us "happy". My immediate reponse of what would make me "happy" right now was so selfish that it makes me want to vomit.

He asked why Christian struggle so much with their selfish natures, and it was a great question. It made me think back to my Truth Project days, and the question: Do you really believe that what you believe is really real? And honestly, if we really did believe what is preached every Sunday, and what is taught in the Greatest Book Ever, we would all be acting a lot differently than we do now.

If we really believed, we would be taking the money given to us through God's gifts, and using it to further His Kingdom, not to fuel our materialistic needs.

If we really believed, we would help everyone who needed it.

If we really believed, we would never be judgmental.

If we really believed, we would be telling our friends and neighbours about Jesus.

Harsh? I guess so, but I'm the first to admit that there must be some doubt in my mind, because if I really believed I sure wouldn't be acting the way I do a lot of the time.

I guess it's these tough times that bring us closer to God, because there's no other way out but to find His guidance.

But I'm so selfish.....

Matthew's Party

Matthew is a bit of an "odd" child; he talks to himself, spins around on the floor, and generally can't be bothered with other people. Still, it broke my heart when, year after year in school, he was not invited to one birthday party, other than one in kindergarten. I can't imagine how many times he heard other kids talking about upcoming parties, and wondered why he was never invited.

However, since he changed schools and found his little gang of friends, everything has changed. He has been invited to at least a couple of parties since June, and right now he is downstairs with his little gang, chatting about lego, acting like boys, and having the time of his life.

This was Matthew's first "invite kids from school" birthday party. He never wanted a birthday party since he never had friends to invite. We were blessed in the past two years to spend his birthday with good friends of ours; a family with more than enough kids for a great party!! Two years ago, it was a surprise party at their house, and last year it was bowling and dinner with them. Now that they have moved away, I'm so thankful that Matthew can fill their void with some buddies from school.

I feel so content hearing them laugh playfully in the basement, and I wonder if they'll be friends all through school. I'm guessing yes - they are like four peas in a pod.

It's just a reminder of what's truly important in this life, and how these moments need to be protected and cherished forever. It's a good step back for me; a step back to look at life and what it's all about.

And I'll give God all the Glory for this one.

I played volleyball last night!!

I'm thrilled to announce that I played volleyball for two hours last night, jumping, stretching, spiking, diving, and other than some sore knees this morning, I feel great!!

Finally.....I'm starting to feel healed.

A Sad Tale

A few posts ago I wrote about how I couldn't be a Saviour in the lives of some of the people I meet down in the inner city, and it really hit home last night. I went in for my usual shift, it was VERY busy, but my favorite community member was not there, and I remembered how he told me on Tuesday that he might be out doing drugs before he headed up north for his new job. I thought he was kind of kidding, and I thought maybe I had talked him out of it, but no such luck.

And it was even worse than that.

His buddy came in and told me he had started drinking on Thursday and had been doing drugs Friday and Saturday, so obviously wouldn't be popping into the Mustard Seed on Saturday night. It was a sad revelation - all of my chatting and positive words did nothing to help this guy, and it sounds like he's on a downward spiral after having such a postive past few weeks.

However, I'm not going to give up - there are lots of others who need positive words of encouragement, and just because I couldn't save my favorite, doesn't mean I won't have an impact on someone else down the road.

That's Better!

I'm feeling much better today than on Monday - the hectic deadline of January 31 is over, and February 29th seems light years away. I can relax (relatively), ponder, and enjoy my day rather than frantically working towards half a dozen deadlines. However, as quickly as January passed by, February will also pass by, so I had better keep on top of things.

Later!